However, an effect of this is that some of our college-educated brothers have forgotten that their college-educated sisters are prizes as well.College educated black men have been told time and time again that they are a rarity, a downright anomaly in our communities. Having a college education is a wonderful thing but it is a piece of the puzzle.However, the more I listened, the more questions formulated in my head. One friend said, “The doorman in my building asked me out on a date. Like I’d date ‘the help’.” Suddenly, I began to understand why some of these women were still single.“What’s wrong with the doorman?” I asked.“Uh, he’s a doorman,” she responded, as if the answer was obvious.The article is perhaps even more profound for what it doesn’t say, than what it does – that a “decent date” is something only college-educated and degreed men can offer to women, and/or that only “decent dates” from such men are what counts.And, as the ensuing comments following the article were keen to point out, invariably these kinds of discussions turn to the “dating/mating/marrying down” variety – i.e., college-educated/white collar professional, and highly accomplished women, having to “slum it” with their “lesser” male counterparts.
But what I have discovered is that it isn’t a man’s incomes or pedigree that makes him my equal, but rather it’s his character, perseverance, and his hustle.This kind of narrative – which does indeed have its basis in fact, I am fully aware and freely admit – has been extant for most of my post-highschool life.Now, to be sure, and to be fair, we have to enter a few things into the official record: one, as noted above, yes, there are more college-educated, professional and higher earning Sistas, than there are Brothas, in absolute numbers.And these traits can be found in a blue-collar brother not just the Brooks Brother brother.Time and time again we are bombarded by negative and oftentimes distorted images of our black men like the falsehood that there are more black men in jail than there are in colleges or universities.